How Old Is Old? Only 29 if You’re a Woman

Remember when 29 seemed like an absolutely ancient age? Yeah, me neither. But according to recent polls, 29 is the actual age you start to feel properly old. If you’re a woman, anyway. Men, on the other hand, don’t start to feel old until they’re way into middle age — 58 to be precise.

But age isn’t everything. The poll, done by Avalon Funeral Plans in the U.K., found some other interesting indicators of old age. For instance, women start to feel ancient as soon as they find their first grey hair. Men aren’t so worried — and why should they be with silver foxes like George Clooney and Richard Gere dominating many a womanly fantasy?

Women also start to feel over the hill once their skin becomes less luminous and their “assets” (as in, breasts) start to sag. And men? It takes much more for a man to feel past his prime — the study found guys don’t feel old until they’re unable to perform in the bedroom, which — given Hugh Hefner’s track record and the advent of Viagra — might not happen for a very looooooooong time.

But if we women judge feelings of age rather shallowly on things like looks, it’s not our fault.

“In our society the attractiveness of women is quite important. Men don’t have to be good looking, but, for some reason, it’s important for women to look presentable,” Professor Cary Cooper of Lancaster University told the Daily Mail. “Magazines are all about youth and are filled with young, attractive women. Women then start to perceive themselves as old when they no longer feel like this, when they don’t feel trendy or fashionable. Men, on the other hand, don’t have to be good looking; it doesn’t concern them.”

There’s another facet to all this too, says Dr. Cooper. While men tend to be more career-oriented, and, therefore, don’t start feeling their age until they’ve moved up the ladder and are nearing retirement, women feel pressure to settle down and raise a family once she turns 30.

It’s important to keep in mind that how old (or young) you feel is largely controlincluding the media. And you know what? Forget them. Act the age you feel, but do it while respecting your body — abusing it is one thing that’s sure to make you old before your time.